catfasteve:

it’s so difficult not being able to use milennial humor in a corporate setting. like i made a mistake today and i wanted to tell my supervisor it’s because i suffer from Dumb Bitch Disease, but do you think that would fly?? fuck no. i gotta say shit like, “sorry for the misunderstanding!” i can’t wait till the workforce is made up entirely of millennials and i can say “sorry i drank idiot juice for breakfast this morning” and my coworkers will be like “oh worm.”

desperatehousecat:

officer: you have one last meal, what do you want

me: hmm idk what are you in the mood for

osjecam:

sorry i’m late, professor. i’m disenchanted with the human experience and waking up every morning thrusts me into an instant existential crisis

passionpeachy:

straight men’s only personality traits are saying “I have a really dark sense of humor” and showing you racist memes on their phone

neilnevins:

hatingongodot:

neilnevins:

the trivia page for The Rugrats Movie is something else

i don’t like this……

Tara Strong when she scopes out a vulnerable new mother

regbian:

wherehipposdrome:

elderberrycoughdrops:

viciously and fatally attacked by an unknown animal at Claire’s

that was no animal, that was Claire herself

the claire witch project

canoasregias:

regbian:

in case you guys wanna know what modern high school dances are like, at mine despacito came on and everyone t-posed around this one kid as he fortnite danced like his life depended on it

brassy:

brassy:

brassy:

brassy:

how do you make someone holy

you beat the hell out of them

my 96 year old catholic grandma told me this

did you just trigger tag my grandma